Love Me or Leave Me Alone 3 Read online

  “Hey. You okay?” I asked the pretty little girl and smiled at her. She shook her head yes and held on to her mama. Poor thing. She probably had no idea what was going on around her.

  “She’s been shaking ever since all that screaming started. Taylor isn’t used to all this. I hate she has to witness it all. I wanted to be here to make sure Cam was alright but I think I better take Taylor home,” Lana said.

  I could tell she was a bit shaken up too. Earlier, she had expressed to Yanna that she had no intentions of being in the way and pretty much called a truce with Yanna. I felt like that was really dope of Lana to do that and I saw her in a new light.

  “Yeah, I think that’s a good idea. Maybe when Yanna comes out, you can take her back there to see her daddy then you guys can go home and get some rest. I think we all could use it.”

  “Whew girl, that is an understatement,” she said as she shook her head.

  As Yanna came out to talk to me, Lana went in with her daughter. I smiled at them.

  “Hey boo. You doing okay? That whole scene was pretty intense. I thought you were going to kill that girl with your bare hands,” I laughed a little, trying to lighten the mood.

  “Girl, I had visions of doing exactly that. I talked to Eva and she calmed me down. I’m gonna let the police handle it. But, like I told Eva, I better not cross paths with Fallon any time soon or that bitch got action on sight.”

  “I feel you but please try to stay calm around her. I know that’s easier said than done but you gotta try. I think I’m gonna head home but call me if you need anything, okay girl?”

  “I will. Thanks Ciara. I love you,” she said and we stood to give each other a hug.

  I left the hospital hoping that things would remain calm while I was gone. I said a silent prayer for my friend and for Cam as well.

  The drive home was a long one and my mind was full of all kinds of thoughts. I pulled into my driveway and shut the engine off. As I was gathering my things to get out of the car, I happened to look up into my rearview mirror in time to spot a blue Lexus parked at the bottom of my driveway, blocking it. I frowned as I wondered who it could be and especially at this time of night. I sat still in my car. If it was Jay’s crazy ass, I didn’t want to get out. He had already shown me what a little too much alcohol would make him do and I was in no mood to try to fight him. Whoever it was realized that I was watching them watch me because they slowly pulled away after a few minutes.

  I was still apprehensive about getting out of my car but then I figured fuck it. I pulled the cap off my pepper spray and got out. I wasn’t about to be held captive in my own driveway. If whoever it was wanted a fight then that’s what they would get.

  I said all that mess in my head and really pumped myself up. But, as soon as my feet hit the ground outside of my car I took off like a bat out of hell! Who was I kidding? Pepper spray couldn’t beat a bullet. Even though I hadn’t pissed anyone off enough to want me dead as far as I knew, I wasn’t taking any chances.

  Surprisingly, I didn’t fumble with my keys too bad and I was inside the house peeping outside in no time. I wanted to see if the Lexus would ride back down the street but I never saw it. I turned on as many lights in the house as I possibly could and made sure that all the doors and windows were locked.

  Everything that had happened with Cam and Yanna had me on edge. I laughed a little at how silly I must have looked running into the house like that but oh well, better safe than sorry.

  As I was calming myself down and pouring a glass of juice, my phone rang and scared the shit out of me! I dropped the glass; juice and glass pieces scattered everywhere. I shook my head and grabbed my chest. I had to get it together.

  “Hello?” I yelled into the phone.

  “Damn girl, what’s wrong with you?” Jay laughed.

  “Was that you sitting outside my house just now? I don’t have time for your games, Jay. What do you want? It’s late,” I said, not feeling up for his shenanigans at the moment.

  “Yo, chill. I’m at home. Why would I be sitting outside your crib? I know you don’t think I’m a stalker now, do you? Come on C, you know me better than that.”

  “Oh yeah? Well, I thought I knew you better before you came in and semi-raped me too, so miss me with all that. My bad if it wasn’t you but my nerves are on a thousand. I get back from the hospital tonight and then somebody was sitting at the end of my driveway in a blue Lexus with dark tinted windows.”

  There was a pause on Jay’s end. I had to take my phone away from my face to look at it and see if the call dropped.

  “A blue Lexus, huh?” Jay repeated but I’m sure it was a rhetorical question.

  “Yeah, a blue Lexus. Why? You know somebody with a car like that? It better not be one of your scandalous hoes, Jay. I do not have the time and you and I are not together.”

  “Asia’s sister bought a new Lexus. It’s blue. Damn. I have no idea why she would be at your house though,” Jay mumbled, more to himself than to me it seemed.

  “Forget about wondering why, how does she know where I live, Jay? You tell that hoe if she got something to say, next time don’t creep around trying to be incognito. Tell her to get whatever it is off her damn chest! I don’t tolerate that type of disrespect, Jay, especially when I’m the last chick she needs to be worried about. She wanted you; she got you, end of story. Now get the hell off my line, please. I’m going to bed. Don’t call me anymore, Jay!”

  I disconnected the call and laughed a little but there wasn’t a damn thing funny. First, I had to deal with the craziness of the shooting and now I got chicks doing ride-bys at my house? Oh hell no, things were getting a little too close for comfort for me. I decided I would deal with Jay another time and prepared my shower. I thought about Darren and wondered what he was doing at the moment. I was supposed to call him earlier to let him know he could come over but then I got the call from Yanna and forgot all about it.

  Darren had started to really grow on me. I was feeling him. We talked about any and everything and he never seemed to get tired of listening to me. I enjoyed his company and always looked forward to the next time that I could see him. The man is sexy too! He is a workout fanatic and his body is always on point. Dark skinned with muscles in places that I didn’t even know muscles existed. He looked like two hundred pounds of deep dark chocolate when he got out of the shower with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. Sometimes I would stare at him and think nothing but dirty thoughts.

  As my mind drifted back to memories of the last time me and Darren got down, I started touching myself. First, I made my nipples hard by rubbing up and down across them gently with the palms of my hands. Then I cupped my right breast and slightly pinched the nipple before dipping my head low so that I could suck on it a little. I did the same thing with the left.

  With one hand full of breast, I took my other hand and traveled down my body to my wetness. I fingered my clit until it was nice and hard. I inserted two fingers inside myself and started to grind my hips slowly. I kept this motion up until my legs were shaking and I was breathing heavily. I came on my fingers then I licked them clean. I needed that release more than anything at that moment. I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower.

  After applying my body cream all over myself, I decided PJs weren’t necessary and climbed in the bed under the covers. The only thing that would have ended the night on an even better note was if Darren was there to give me what I needed so badly. I drifted off to sleep imagining doing all kinds of nasty things to him.

  Chapter 4

  Star

  I had been up all night. I couldn’t sleep. I kept replaying Indigo’s words in my head.

  I have herpes. You might want to get yourself tested.

  She said it casually and walked off like she told me she had a damn yeast infection or something. I should have fucked her up before she had the chance to finish her sentence. I’m tired of these ratchet chicks always trying to mess up my life. Do they want me
to go to jail again?

  For the first time in a long time, I cried. At first, I didn’t even realize the sounds that I heard were coming from me. The cry came from somewhere deep inside. It was like it rose from my stomach and traveled up and out through my mouth. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I wasn’t crying because I thought I had herpes. It was way bigger than that. I cried for the love that I thought I had for Indigo. I cried for the fact that I might possibly have to kill this bitch if my test came back positive. I cried because I’ve been dealt shitty hands all my life.

  A part of me was starting to wonder was it all worth it? Who would miss me if I was no longer here? Who would come to my funeral? I had a feeling nobody would even notice I was gone until my body started to decompose. I was in a dark, dark place and I knew it.

  I popped open my last bottle of Jack Daniels Tennessee Honey and didn’t even bother to get a cup. I turned the bottle up and let the brown liquid soothe my soul. The more I drank, the less I cried, and the more pissed off I got. Indigo must really think I’m a weak bitch. I loved her at one point but this is a different time. I will break her little ass in half if I have that shit and she should know this.

  I waited around until eight to make an appointment at the clinic. This is about to be some embarrassing shit but it’s cool. Indigo better hope I don’t have that shit. She better pray. Nah, fuck that. Indigo better run.

  After I finished almost the entire bottle of whiskey, I went to my room to lie down. I figured I might as well try to get some sleep. Before lying down, I opened my top dresser drawer and pulled out my 9mm. I looked at it, making sure I had plenty of bullets. Enough for two people if necessary.

  ****

  Sleep came easily for me but it was a restless sleep. I woke up way before my alarm clock was set to go off so I figured I might as well get up and get dressed. Walking into the doctor’s office, I was nervous as hell. I felt like people could tell I was there to get tested for some nasty shit. The nurse checked me and took me back to a room where I was instructed to get undressed from the waist down and wait for the doctor. I must have waited forever before she finally decided to show up.

  “Hello, Star, I’m Dr. Jackson. How are you doing today?” the pale white female doctor came into my room. I had been sitting in that cold ass room for who knows how long. It probably had only been a few minutes but it felt like hours.

  “I’ll let you know how I’m doing after you cut to the chase and tell me if I have herpes or not,” I said. I didn’t have time to waste. I needed to know if I was about to go home and get blazed or plot a murder.

  “Well then, I’ll get right down to it. I looked over the test results and you have not contracted herpes. I do have some pamphlets here about the dangers of STDs and safe sex, including abstinence. I wish you well, honey. Be careful,” the doctor said and then asked if I had any more questions for her.

  “Nah, I’m straight. Thanks.”

  That was all I could manage to say. I was trippin' hard. I was happy as hell that I didn’t have it. I think I was in shock because I really thought the test would come back positive. That’s the kinda fucked up luck I’ve always had in life. Now I could go to work not wanting to kill Indigo but then again I would probably have those dark thoughts about her for a long time. You don’t play with somebody’s life like that. I should have known what time it was with her. She seemed different at first and I wanted to believe her, but no more. I was done being nice to these hoes. I’m gonna start treating them like they treat me. Fuck that love me or leave me alone shit. I ain’t giving any ultimatums and these bitches ain’t getting no choices. Love don’t live here anymore.

  When I got home, I poured myself some Crown Apple and downed it in one gulp. I lit a blunt and sat down in front of the TV but I didn’t turn it on. I looked at my phone and had a missed call from Indigo. She must be crazy or has a death wish. I contemplated getting my number changed. Indigo dodged a bullet but if she kept fucking with me, I couldn’t be responsible for the next one that was lined up at her head.

  Chapter 5

  Ayanna

  “Baby girl, wake up.”

  I slowly opened my eyes to find Cam sitting up smiling at me.

  “Hmmm, good morning baby. How are you feeling?” I stretched and smiled at him.

  “I’m good, ready to get up out this joint. Doc says they might be releasing me today. My shoulder is still sore as hell but other than that, I’m good.”

  “Good. I have had enough of this hospital and the drama. I’ll be so glad to get you home,” I smiled at him.

  “Yo, you serious about this moving in thing, huh?”

  “As a heart attack. Why? You don’t want to? If you don’t, Cam, say that. I’d rather know now than six months down the road when we’re having nothing ass arguments because you don’t wanna be there.”

  “Girl kill that noise. I said I was down, right? You starting already. Can a nigga get out the hospital bed first?” Cam laughed at me.

  I pretended to hit him in his wounded arm and he gave me an ‘I wish you would’ look. Hopefully I wasn’t making a big mistake but at the moment, I didn’t care. I wanted Cam to be with me. I had fallen in love with his sexy and cocky ass.

  Rommell and Chris walked in. I figured they had some things to talk about so I excused myself. I didn’t wanna be an accessory to whatever it was anyway. I’ve heard things about how Rommell got down and since he was Cam’s right hand man, I didn’t put anything past Cam either. As I was walking out into the waiting room, Lana was coming in. She didn’t have Taylor with her this time.

  “Hey girl, how is Cam doing?” she asked.

  “Hey Lana. He’s doing real well. The doctors say he might be released today.”

  “Oh, that is a blessing. Come here and sit down because girl I got some shit to tell you.”

  Oh Lord, here we go.

  Whenever a chick starts a conversation like that, it’s either going to be some news that’s going to make you laugh, shock you, or straight piss you off.

  “So, word on the street is that when they got Tracey and Fallon to the police station, Tracey started singing like a canary. They said Tracey told the whole story about how much Fallon hates you and how she wanted you to be scared enough to leave her brother alone. Tracey said they never intended to kill you. They wanted to scare you. She wasn’t even supposed to hit anyone, I heard she said she was aiming at the car but she ain’t never shot no gun before. I’m surprised she hit anybody at all. Now girl, I don’t know if any of this is true, but, from what I hear, they got Fallon in jail with no bail. Tracey’s sister bailed her out last night.”

  I sat there listening to all of Lana’s words. I wanted to get at Tracey. I wanted to know what would really make her follow through with a dumbass plan like that. What kind of hold did Fallon have on Tracey to make her do something so stupid?

  “What I wanna know is why would Tracey agree to do it? I love Eva and Ciara to death but I ain’t going to jail for them over nothing stupid like that. I’m not trying to kill nobody. What the hell is wrong with these chicks?” I said more to myself than anything.

  “Honey, I don’t know but I’m thankful that Cam is alright and that nobody else got hurt. I hope Tracey gets the hell out of dodge because I really don’t want Cam and Rommell to get to her. Nobody else needs to be behind bars over this mess because it really could have turned out a lot worse.”

  I thought about that and agreed with her. I still had a feeling that they would soon see Miss Tracey. I wanted things to go back to normal, whatever that is. I wasn’t used to all this. Even though I was now carrying a gun, I still wasn’t used to this life. I never had to think about death or killing someone. Life sure has a funny way of playing tricks on you, I swear.

  “Well, I’m going to go home so I can shower and change then I’ll be back up here to take Cam home. I’m going to go tell him I’m leaving. You want me to let him know you’re here?” I asked Lana.

  “Yeah, would you please?
I won’t stay long, just wanted to check on him,” she said and smiled a little.

  When I knocked on the door to let them know I was back, the fellas immediately stopped talking about whatever it was they had been discussing. I shook my head and tried not to worry.

  “What’s up, ma?” Cam greeted me.

  “I’m going home to take a shower and change. Lana is here and she said she wanted to check on you. I’ll be back real soon. Don’t leave without me,” I winked.

  “Aye, where am I going?” he said and raised his arm that was still connected to an IV.

  As soon as I got outside, I decided to call Star. For some reason she had been on my mind and I realized that I forgot to tell her what happened.

  “Star, what’s up girl?” I said when she answered.

  “What’s up? Girl, I been asking everybody where you been. Al’s been pitching a bitch fit as usual talking about respect and blah, blah, blah. Girl, you know how he does. So what’s up with you? You quit on us and ain’t bother to leave a note?” she laughed.

  “Girl, where do I start? I think Al will excuse my absence seeing as how I almost lost my life the other night,” I said sarcastically.

  “Wait, What? Come again?” Star said sounding confused.

  “Long story short, I was waiting on Cam to get out of his car at my house when some chick walked up and shot him. I’m leaving the hospital, girl. It’s been crazy.”

  “A chick? What the hell? Is Cam aight? Scratch that, are you alright?”

  “Yeah, I’m good. Fallon put one of her friends up to it. Girl, that bullet was meant for me. She had bad aim,” I said while shaking my head as if Star could see me.

  “I knew Fallon was a dumb bitch but I never thought she was mental. I know Cam gotta be kinda messed up in the head over that one. Fallon, as crazy as she acted, was always his love. How foul is it that you get shot by your own damn sister? That’s crazy, yo, for real for real.”

  “Exactly. I am so worried about what him and Rommell are gonna do. I don’t want my baby going to jail behind nothing stupid. Lana told me Tracey, the girl who shot him, spilled the beans once they got to the police station,” I was saying but Star cut me off.